5 Reasons Why I Won't Ever Be Friends With The Man Who Broke My Heart
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by Mimi Suh
It’s been 1 week since you last texted me. 2 years since we last spoke. We were together for roughly 3 years. And we broke up about 4 years ago. So after all this time you would think I would be okay by now. “Okay” enough to have a normal relationship with you, so you say. Okay enough for us to be friends. But I am not “okay” and I will never be “okay-enough” to be your friend. I could list a hundred reasons why but I’ve boiled it down to 5.
1. You are a cheater.
Ok so technically I was the one you cheated with, since you weren’t legally separated like you told me you were. But the entire three years we were together you had me believing that you and your wife had legally separated. But in truth, you actually lived with her the entire time we were together. You slept with her, held her, kissed her, and made love to her.
2. You are a liar.
You lied to me about where you slept every night, who you were with, why you couldn’t spend any holidays with me, what else? How many lies did you tell me in those 3 years? Can you even remember? Let’s try to do the math. There’s 365 days in a year and we were together for 3 years and so that’s 1095 days. Let’s estimate that you told me at least 3.5 lies per day--I know, I’m low balling here. So that equals out to 3832.5 lies. Holy shit. If telling that many lies doesn’t make you a liar then I don’t know what does.
3. You are selfish.
You are selfish because you never considered me or my feelings when you lied and cheated on me. Never once did you have the decency to let me decide for myself if I wanted to be with a cheating liar. No, you decided that for me. You are selfish because you took everything I gave you and gave me nothing in return. Other than the one night every two or three weeks that lasted from dusk till dawn. I should have known that you were rushing home to crawl into bed with your wife when you crawled out of my bed at 4 in the damn morning.
4. You are heartless.
You never loved me. Although you knew just how much I was head over heels in love with you from the moment I laid my eyes on you. For three years you put on quite a show pretending that you loved me. Pretending that you were so busy with your business and your kids that you couldn’t make time for me, but in reality you were playing house with another woman. You should have just been honest and let me go. But for three whole years you kept me captive; holding me back from the possibility of meeting an actual honest man who would really love me.
5. You are ruthless.
Three years of lying and cheating on me and pretending to love me wasn’t enough for you; you came back for more blood. Like when we spoke a year after we broke up and you told me you were working things out with your wife and I told you that I was casually dating someone. Remember that?
Then you told me to “f**k off” and that you didn’t ever want to know anything else about me? And I begged you to calm down and you blocked my number? Remember that? Oh yes, of course you do. Because two years after that debacle, when I was just beginning to move on and forget about you, you text me “I’m sorry”. Sorry for what exactly? For cheating? Lying? Or being a selfish, heartless jerk? I tried to be the bigger person and accepted your apology. I assumed you had enough blood by now and you wouldn't come back for more.
But boy was I wrong. You used my forgiveness as an invitation to creep back into my life and attempted to make me fall back in love with your ever so charming demeanor. You continued to text me, trying to get me to be “normal” with you; to be your friend. And when I told you to stay away this time, you made yourself out to be the victim. You’re always out to get more blood. You are ruthless.
Yeah I might sound like I’m still angry, and upset about our breakup and what you did to me and that’s because I am. I’m still angry. I’m still bitter. I’m still hurt and heartbroken. And even when I’m completely over you and my heart is mended back from being shattered into a million fragments, I still won't want to be your friend.
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