To the Friend Who I Thought I Would Grow Old With
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BY: ANNA BASHEDLY
"True friendship multiplies the good in life and divides its evils. Strive to have friends, for life without friends is like life on a desert island… to find one real friend in a lifetime is good fortune; to keep him is a blessing."
From day one we just kind of got each other... gurl, you had me at hello.
We went through every single stage together. From the nice stage where it was strictly all compliments and no teasing to the "hey you dickhead f*cking answer me,” to the literally no convo is off limits phase and then to the final phase where it went something like: “Yo I’m having dinner with your mom. Are you going to join us?"
You were literally my sister. And never once through any of those phases, (even through our fight like a couple phase) did I think that there would come a day where we would no longer be best friends.
You changed my life.
You made me live in the moment, you tore down my walls. With you by my side, I felt like somehow everything was going to be okay; you believed in me when I didn’t believe in myself. You brought out my Trap Queen confidence and made me not give a shit about what people thought.
You never let me self-deprecate. You told me when I was being a whiny bitch, needed to shut the hell up, and move on. I loved you for it.
There are a million things I never thanked you for.
You were the one person who I relied on to tell me the things that I probably didn’t want to hear, but 100 percent needed to. Thank you for always making me come to my senses; when I missed that fuckboy, my friends would tell me to call him, while you would tell me: Fuck that asshole. Stab him. I’ll bail you outta jail. You saved me a lot of tears.
When I did cry, you knew exactly what to say to make me feel better, whether it was hating that person that did me wrong more than I did, making me realize that I was upset for nothing, or making me laugh through my tears, you just made everything suck a lot less.
You challenged me, you never tip-toed around me, our friendship was always a sweet responsibility, never an opportunity, I realize now how rare that was.
Life got complicated.
This whole life ordeal got rough, things weren't as simple as they used to be when we were younger. It’s not that we gave up on our friendship, it’s just that certain circumstances happened.
But our friendship didn’t end because of a lack of love. I’ll always have mad love for you. That’s never going to change. When someone touches your heart, they will always have a place there.
I miss you all the time.
I always want to send you stuff because you’re the only who will understand. I check up on you from time to time to see how you’re doing, and you’re doing great, btw, like I knew you would. (Though we both know we would be killing the game twice as hard if we still had each other).
I said a lot of stuff I didn’t mean. But my anger was fueled by emotions, not by indifference. When you love someone like a sister, you also fight with them like a sister, and sometimes you’re both just too proud to give in.
I thought we’d glow old together bae, but sometimes, life has other plans. No matter what though, I’ll always love you.
And don't worry, all that dirt I got on you when you were drunk is safe and sound.
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